reality sets in

I met with my neurosurgeon yesterday. I asked him and his assistant a myriad of questions, three pages worth. This was no casual meeting, usually my doctor’s appointments don’t last that long, this one was fairly lengthy; I was there about two hours. We concluded by scheduling a date for surgery, Tuesday, January 13, 2009.

I expect to be in the hospital for 3 to 5 days. Recovery will take a long time. Patience was stressed. I anticipate at least 90 days of disability. During that time, I will be at home recovering.

I am feeling a wide range of emotions; at one end I am relieved, at the other I am very concerned and quite fearful. I am relieved that finally I have a firm date for surgery. However, I am also fearful of the severity of the surgery. I completely trust my surgeon. He came highly recommended and is very capable.

When I asked about my surgery, I was shown an example of what my spine will look like after surgery. My disk at L4 (lower back) will be removed. In its place a bone graft will be inserted. A superstructure will be constructed at L4 to help support my spine. It is this superstructure that scares and intimidates me.

Two titanium rods will be secured onto my spine one on the left and the other on the right. These rods are at least 1/8 of an inch in diameter. These rods will be attached to the vertebrate above and below L4. Holes will be drilled in my spine at four points. Screws will be tapped into place, to secure four “clamps.” I have provided a picture that may help you see what my spine will look like. This depiction is not exactly what my superstructure will look like, but it is very close. Maybe this will help you understand my fear.

Please cover me and this process in prayer. Pray that God will bless me with His peace and rest. Pray that God will cover me with His hand of protection and provision. Pray that He will bless me with His reassurance that everything will be okay. Pray that I will approach my surgery with confidence and not fear. Pray that I will use my time between now and then to prepare my heart, soul, mind and spirit for what is to come. With a fearful heart, Rick